


Fight Me

by swtalmnd



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Canon What Canon, Gen, Humor, Identity Porn, Writin' Dirty 2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-01
Updated: 2019-05-01
Packaged: 2020-02-10 15:50:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18663463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/swtalmnd/pseuds/swtalmnd
Summary: I mean, who else could fill this last prompt but Steve Rogers? Who of course is speaking at Midtown High when he spots a bully.There is so much depressing canon this ignores, so just go with it.





	Fight Me

**Author's Note:**

  * For [QueenThayet](https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenThayet/gifts).



> Writin' Dirty April 2019 has been so fun, I can't believe it's over! But this is the last of these weird-ass prompt ficlets you'll see from me for a while.
> 
> I mean, Inceptiversary is coming...

Steve stood toe to toe with the bully who'd been pushing one of the kids at Midtown, not so much head to head but looming over him. "You want to fight someone so bad, you can fight me," he growled, furious.

"Uh, hey, no it's fine, I don't need," the kid was babbling, and he sounded vaguely familiar.

The bully cowered and blanched. "N-no, sir?"

"March your ass inside and tell them Captain America sent you to detention," said Steve. "Enjoy the video."

There was a hysterical giggle from behind him and Steve turned, going instantly comforting. "Hey, sorry, I hope that doesn't make it worse." The kid was skinny but wiry, messy hair that reminded Steve of Tony a little, and a sheepish look on his face.

"Uh, it'll be fine, Flash is just an assh- um. Jerk?" He stuck his hand out. "P-peter Parker, sir. I'm an intern at Stark Industries."

"Oh, that's why you sound familiar," said Steve, shaking Peter's hand. "Hey, need a ride back to the tower?"

Peter giggled again, eyes widening again. "Uh, okay? Just lemme, um." He got his phone out and started frantically texting, and Steve scanned the crowd of onlookers, seeing a lot more phones.

"I'll have to go see him when this ends up on youtube, anyway." Steve sighed and led Peter, still texting, over to his bike. "You okay riding b-, um, passenger?"

Peter laughed. "Tell you what. You can swear, and I can swear, and we'll swear never to tell Mr. Stark?" He tucked his phone away and put his hand out for the spare helmet. "I can ride bitch, I'm good at sticking to stuff."

That rang another bell in Steve's head, but he shoved it aside in favor of getting them on the road and to Tony in one piece. He might drive like a maniac by himself, but he didn't want to explain to Tony that he'd broken his intern.

They parked in the garage, and the elevator cheerfully greeted them both and informed them that Tony was in the lab and the video had already gone viral.

"Fuck," said Steve, with deep feeling. "Uh, don't tell Tony I said that."

"Too late," said Tony, elevator doors opening. "Fortunately for you, I'm aware that the youth of America here knows bad words. So. Tried to kick a teenager's ass?"

"I sent him to detention," said Steve defensively.

"It was so cool, Mr. Stark, can I see the video? Steve saying 'fight me' and Flash about died." Peter was like a puppy, bouncing all over the room, looking at Stark's workstations and ending up next to him. They all watched in silence once together, and then again with Peter providing commentary. 

"Dude, that was like a fucking meme! I need Flash's face for my phone," said Peter. "And 'fight me' has to be my new ringtone."

"FRIDAY, put it in the shop, proceeds to Cap's usual charity," said Tony. "I want it for his texts."


End file.
